A poem, with a point to make.

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2ndRateMind
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A poem, with a point to make.

Post #1

Post by 2ndRateMind »

Spare me, please, your pious cant
Your 'Thou shalt not!', your moral rant,
And let me live as I am made
Wild and free and unafraid,
Dreading naught of Judgment Day,
Pilgrim on another way.
If I'm wrong, I'll rot in Hell,
But rotting there remember well
The span I spent as but a ploy
To spread subversive, anarchic joy
And think my life not such a crime
If others, too, enjoyed my time

But where I tread, at every turn,
Are men of faith, set grim and stern,
Rigid in their claim to be
So moral, they know more than me.
But, cowed beneath their codes and laws
They've lost the plot. The greater cause
Is not constraint by moral rules
(Cages built for souls by fools)
But the sharing of an inward light;
The love of all that's good and right
And just, and true, and fair, and Man
Was made for this, and this God's plan.

Copyright © 2020 2ndRateMind. All rights reserved.

Best wishes, 2RM.
Non omnes qui errant pereunt
Not all who wander are lost

koko

Post #2

Post by koko »

Great poem.

Like others, I, too, have a tendency to sit in judgment of others - just part of being human, I guess. Makes me wonder if you ever heard from the Moral Majority because of your views on this matter. ;)

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Post #3

Post by 2ndRateMind »

[Replying to post 2 by koko]

Hi Koko. Thank you for your kind words. As for 'the moral majority', my feeling is that they are neither moral nor a majority. Just noisy.

Best wishes, 2RM.
Non omnes qui errant pereunt
Not all who wander are lost

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Re: A poem, with a point to make.

Post #4

Post by Wootah »

[Replying to post 1 by 2ndRateMind]

I say to all good people,

This I know before you go down below to give Satan a big hello.

You thought you spread such joy up above
but all you did was used the gifts of the God of love.

But you will discover all your good is no longer there
and that it was borrowed it was from the man upstairs.

The wicked know that's where they belong and so they beg to God to forgive their wrong.

But you will discover your good qualities were from another
and that hell is full of good people just like each other.
Proverbs 18:17 The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.

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"Why is everyone so quick to reason God might be petty. Now that is creating God in our own image :)."

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Re: A poem, with a point to make.

Post #5

Post by 2ndRateMind »

[Replying to post 4 by Wootah]

So, I guess from the tone of your writing, we have some theological differences. From its content, that we have had different life-chances. That's all fine, by me. Diversity is 'a good thing', in my opinion.

But as for poetry, it needs structure, rhyme and rhythm. Or, it is not poetry, just self-indulgent self-expression, such as the art colleges encourage.

I think you have something worth saying, to say. But I also think you could probably say it better.

Best wishes, 2RM.
Non omnes qui errant pereunt
Not all who wander are lost

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Re: A poem, with a point to make.

Post #6

Post by 2ndRateMind »

[Replying to post 5 by 2ndRateMind]

Addendum:

Verse 1 line 10 should now read 'To spread this sweet, subversive joy'

Verse 2 line 11 should now read 'And kind, and just, and true, and Man'

Best wishes, 2RM
Non omnes qui errant pereunt
Not all who wander are lost

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Re: A poem, with a point to make.

Post #7

Post by Wootah »

[Replying to post 5 by 2ndRateMind]

Sorry to do that on your poetry thread. It started off as a quick comment and then ....

Imitation ... flattery and all that.
Proverbs 18:17 The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.

Member Notes: viewtopic.php?t=33826

"Why is everyone so quick to reason God might be petty. Now that is creating God in our own image :)."

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Re: A poem, with a point to make.

Post #8

Post by 2ndRateMind »

[Replying to post 7 by Wootah]

That's all OK. And more than OK. I just want you to spread your thoughts in the most effective way possible. And provide the odd pointer, should you choose your medium to be poetry, rather than prose, blog, spoken word, film, etc.

Best wishes, 2RM.
Non omnes qui errant pereunt
Not all who wander are lost

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