The Change.

[Corvus]

The person you love has attended a publicly displayed scientific experiment on teleportation. (Bear with me.) In a strange twist of circumstances, something goes horribly wrong and the person you love turns into a member of the opposite sex.

Would you still love them? Would you be willing to pursue the relationship?

[Spongemom]

Is there anything different about them? Is the personality still the same? Are they essentially the same person? If so, then I would say yes, because it doesn't make any difference, so long as the person inside is the same.

[ST88]

This assumes that [she] would be willing also. After the initial sci-fi shock period of adjustment, I would imagine that [she] would have a difficult time with being a [male] physically. How would the different hormones affect the way [she] thought?

I would find it extremely difficult to continue the relationship normally. I say this with some surprise at my answer. Part of love has to be attraction, and I couldn't be attracted to a [man] no matter who [she] was. Even if [she] were the same person and had just changed anatomy, I don't think I would be able to continue the marriage. At least not in the conventional sense. I wouldn't be able to turn off my feelings for [her], but I don't think I would be able to overcome the change in order to behave the same way towards [her].

Corvus, have you read The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin? It's about a race of ambisexual creatures -- they are naturally gender neutral, but shift and switch their genders based on the person they are attracted to. Fascinating subject.

[mrmufin]

The person you love has attended a publicly displayed scientific experiment on teleportation. (Bear with me.) In a strange twist of circumstances, something goes horribly wrong and the person you love turns into a member of the opposite sex.

Would you still love them? Would you be willing to pursue the relationship?

The short answer is probably not.

If my she-mufin turned into a he-mufin, I might still like the person; perhaps even love the person in some platonic sense, but I don't think we'll be all snugglin' an' kissin' an' stuff. Part of what makes the very lovely msmufin so darn lovely is that she's a she, not a he. And open-minded as I am, I have no desire to get all kissy with another guy.

Regards,
mrmufin

[Piper Plexed]

The person you love has attended a publicly displayed scientific experiment on teleportation. (Bear with me.) In a strange twist of circumstances, something goes horribly wrong and the person you love turns into a member of the opposite sex.

Would you still love them? Would you be willing to pursue the relationship?

Ok well I know I am not physically attracted to women, and this is not an educated guess :censored: though I am attracted to my husband and part of that attraction is to his personality so assuming that the personality did not morph with the gender well heck, I wouldn't run for the hills. I would thank God that we didn't want more children. I'd give it an ample period for adjustment and put off any major decisions till we both knew how we felt.

As a side note... if he didn't grow hair and his goatee didn't disappear well yikes what an ugly woman he would make! Try to picture Jesse Ventura as a girl, now that would be true love to stay with him aah her aaah it!

edited to add... a picture of Jesse Ventura as it occurred to me that not all members are American and may not be hip on American Politics or Professional wrestling

[Corvus]

This assumes that [she] would be willing also. After the initial sci-fi shock period of adjustment, I would imagine that [she] would have a difficult time with being a [male] physically. How would the different hormones affect the way [she] thought?

Let's assume that they are adapting to it quite well for the purposes of this ethical dilemma. Let us also take public opinion of a same-sex relationship completely ot off the equation, since, although whether one would dump a partner based on what parents, family and neigbours think is interesting dilemma in itself, I am more concerned with people's feeligns towards their lover and how they would treat them.

Corvus, have you read The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin? It's about a race of ambisexual creatures -- they are naturally gender neutral, but shift and switch their genders based on the person they are attracted to. Fascinating subject.

Never read it (as you probably guessed), but I will add it to my reading list along with Ismail Kadare. Sexuality is a very interesting subjec to me - there are still so many questions about it that have not been answered, and so many of its issues are now confronting modern society.

Your answer is quite interesting. Personally, I don't feel attractions towards people of any kind. I have tried analysing my desires and found that it is not sexuality that attracts me, it is sensuality, which requires, to some extent, an intellectual effort, or an effort of will to perceive it. The beauty of a woman or man does nothing more to me than the beauty of a painting. However, a beautiful woman playing a bass between her legs, embracing it as she makes music is an image that I think of as filled with sensuality and will arouse my interest. But I realise it is not an interest in the woman, but a desire to somehow worship what I see as a demonstration of beauty. There is no real attraction. I have felt this way for a long time, and since I have always been able to determine beauty, so, in order to fit in, when younger I would make suitable exclamations of desire to friends when a beautiful woman was seen even if no desire was forthcoming. I have pinned it down to not having an inclination for possessing people. I don't really understand the term physical attraction because my attractions have always been mental first.

I can respect beauty in both sexes, and perceive sensuality in both of them, so that I suppose I would not have as many reservations if my lover suddenly changed sex unless they made a very ugly man. I may not have any real attraction, but I can still be repulsed. I can't help but feel that women are at an advantage in this regard. Heterosexual women naturally appreciate men, who are so much more coarser in appearance than women. If they can appreciate men, then something fairer surely wouldn't be so difficult to love.

[Piper Plexed]

I can't help but feel that women are at an advantage in this regard. Heterosexual women naturally appreciate men, who are so much more coarser in appearance than women. If they can appreciate men, then something fairer surely wouldn't be so difficult to love.

Ahhh but don't you know that it is exactly that which you phrase as coarse that I opt to phrase as strength, the very thing that makes me a heterosexual female. So by virtue of your above statement I would guess you, my dear Corvus, to be a Cerebral heterosexual and a humanist.

The Mom in me just has to add, sweety, you just need to find the right person

[Vianne]

Hmmm ... that's a tough one. I guess if he were able to adjust to it, I wouldn't mind giving it a shot. He would still be someone I loved, right?

There are some things I just wouldn't be able to do, although maybe that could change over time.

Women are by nature much more sexualized than men in today's society, so it's not hard for me to see another woman as hot ... I'm not so sure about doing anything more than that.

In a nutshell, I'd keep an open mind, but we would have to take it easy!

Vianne

[Amphigorey]

That would be very difficult. I have to agree with St88, part of any love relationship is physical attraction. Certainly my sexual orientation isn't going to change overnight. So this really becomes at least a test of empathy if not one of latent bisexuality.

But I think your description of the nature of the change is perhaps a bit incomplete. That is, does the person come back completely different or are they completely recognizable except for whatever changed? hormones? genitalia? hairstyle? I mean if my 220lb, rugby playing black haired partner came back as a petite 105lb blond in 3 inch stilletoes, I would have a problem. But the real problem would be in convincing me that it was the same person.

On the other hand, watching someone you love go through a sex change beyond or against their will would be heartbreaking in the extreme. I'm certain that through sheer empathy I would stay with that person and help them deal with their change. Most people would opt for corrective hormonal treatment immediately. But I couldn't say what would happen in the long term. It would depend a great deal on how my partner was able to deal with the change.

Then again, if the change was "minor" or gradual, who knows but that I might adjust with it over time.

The Mom in me just has to add, sweety, you just need to find the right person

Asexuality is an interesting subject as well. <a href="http://www.asexuality.org/discussion/" target="_new">AVEN</a> is another on line community that's worth visiting and describes what Corvus is talking about.