How to Avoid Warnings
Posted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 9:15 am
A debater asked me for advice on how to get his point across without getting warned. So in a private message I sent some ideas:
Just say, "please answer my question which was: ". . . ." There's no need for nasty sarcasm.
Don't be afraid to acknowledge an opposing debater made a good point [here], but but that she is in error when he writes: . . . . Avoid using words like "delusional." Instead, you can suggest they "misapprehend the facts."
I'm the first to agree that some may seem not too well educated, but it takes more work to educate them and point out their logical flaws, than it does to just call them "CRAZY" or make personal insults.
I'd avoid calling extra attention to sarcasm or insults by avoiding ALL CAPS AND PUTTING THEM IN BOLD TYPE.
And ALWAYS hit 'preview' first. Then when you notice you've stepped over the line, use that to rewrite and force yourself to be specific about why you think they are idiots. You'll also find some of your typos, misspellings, and bad grammar and have a chance to fix it and not look as stupid as you think the person is who you're responding to.
For example, instead of calling someone a liar, you can quote them, then quote a reliable source showing they are wrong, and another source, or another quote from them showing they KNEW or should have, that their facts were wrong. But you can't raise anyone's IQ by telling him he's stupid.
Believe me, my temper is probably worse than yours. But ever once in a while, I pause before I hit 'send.' [....] and if I can reign in [most of the time] my desire to call someone [expletive deleted], so can you.
It's almost like cheating, but you can cultivate some pet phrases. Instead of "your thinking sucks," you can say "I think the logical error in your claim is..." and then explain WHY it was not logical.
Unfortunately, this requires you to actually think thru WHY you think their thinking is deficient. Your conclusion, "That was a stupid thing to say," may be spot on, but instead of the label, demonstrate specifically whyit was stupid, without calling it 'stupid,' or worse, calling THEM stupid.
And focus on their sentences, rather then on them. Whenever you see the word "you" in one of your proposed responses, that should be a warning to reexamine your writing to see whether you are attacking them, rather than what they wrote.
Now... I have to try to take my own advice.
Just say, "please answer my question which was: ". . . ." There's no need for nasty sarcasm.
Don't be afraid to acknowledge an opposing debater made a good point [here], but but that she is in error when he writes: . . . . Avoid using words like "delusional." Instead, you can suggest they "misapprehend the facts."
I'm the first to agree that some may seem not too well educated, but it takes more work to educate them and point out their logical flaws, than it does to just call them "CRAZY" or make personal insults.
I'd avoid calling extra attention to sarcasm or insults by avoiding ALL CAPS AND PUTTING THEM IN BOLD TYPE.
And ALWAYS hit 'preview' first. Then when you notice you've stepped over the line, use that to rewrite and force yourself to be specific about why you think they are idiots. You'll also find some of your typos, misspellings, and bad grammar and have a chance to fix it and not look as stupid as you think the person is who you're responding to.
For example, instead of calling someone a liar, you can quote them, then quote a reliable source showing they are wrong, and another source, or another quote from them showing they KNEW or should have, that their facts were wrong. But you can't raise anyone's IQ by telling him he's stupid.
Believe me, my temper is probably worse than yours. But ever once in a while, I pause before I hit 'send.' [....] and if I can reign in [most of the time] my desire to call someone [expletive deleted], so can you.
It's almost like cheating, but you can cultivate some pet phrases. Instead of "your thinking sucks," you can say "I think the logical error in your claim is..." and then explain WHY it was not logical.
Unfortunately, this requires you to actually think thru WHY you think their thinking is deficient. Your conclusion, "That was a stupid thing to say," may be spot on, but instead of the label, demonstrate specifically whyit was stupid, without calling it 'stupid,' or worse, calling THEM stupid.
And focus on their sentences, rather then on them. Whenever you see the word "you" in one of your proposed responses, that should be a warning to reexamine your writing to see whether you are attacking them, rather than what they wrote.
Now... I have to try to take my own advice.