Former Atheists - What convinced you?

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rikuoamero
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Former Atheists - What convinced you?

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What I'm writing here is for those people who consider themselves to be former atheist i.e. at one point in life, they either lacked a belief in a god of any kind, or actively disbelieved there is a God (there's a difference between the two).
I'm hoping that at least some people who are of this group (and hopefully joined the usergroup called 'Former Atheist' on this site) are/were also skeptical, in that they demanded evidence for religious claims.

My question is - What is it that convinced you? If you were to somehow go back in time and meet your previous, atheist (hopefully skeptic) self, would you or could you use whatever it is that convinced you to convince that version of you? Or would your past self be skeptical and dismissive of what it is you present?

Just to be clear - This isn't restricted to Christians only. You can be a Muslim who considers him/herself former atheist or whatever religion or belief you subscribe to. I want to hear from you.
I also promise NOT to debate in this thread. All I want are responses and your thoughts on this question. I will probably debate elsewhere, but not on this thread. This thread is solely for me to gather information.

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Re: Former Atheists - What convinced you?

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2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmOk first of all I'm a cat lover so this upsets me. So I I can empathize with you. If someone took one of my cats to sell them, I'd probably come unglued.
I did come unglued, I just had to stuff it since nobody was on my side. I loved that cat in addition to her being a monumentally valuable possession. She slept on my face every night. I loved her babies too, but parting with them was something I had to do because I needed the income at the time. I was just at the point where if she had her usual number, I could have kept one, and then that. I had to move away. It was the only way to get away from those alcoholic scum. Besides me, everyone in my immediate family is either alcoholic themself, or an enabler.

I had to build up my whole life again, from scratch, and I'm just now at the point where I have a house and show cats again. I compulsively do head counts and freak out when something sounds like the door opening. They're not day- and nightmares about just having my cats stolen, but about having that happen, and the thief being good and myself evil.

This is what alcoholism does, and then alcoholics go to what I honestly believe is a cult to be taught a smashup form of Christianity/Judaism/Islam that claims it's "spiritual, but not a religion" and forces everyone else to forgive whatever horrible things they do because they're alcoholics. There's an episode of South Park that sums it up perfectly.



This is... not an exaggeration. Alcoholics Anonymous literally teaches this to alcoholics: You are sick. You can't help it. Only God can help you help it. This is an example of why I don't believe in the First Amendment. I don't think baby-eaters, animal sacrificers, or seriously dangerous cults need legal protection because "itz a religion lol haha free immunity blanket i break laws now".
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmCan you see how knowing the currency conversion makes this parable easier to understand what Jesus was trying to teach?
I see how the slave was a greedy piece of offal. In order to rack up millions of dollars in debt while being a slave (some translations I'm told have this as slave, not servant), in which state your needs are provided for, as far as I see it, you pretty much have to be a gambling addict who might as well be glued to a slot machine. Why was he so concerned about five bucks? Well, to me it's obvious he wanted it to gamble with. Why I feel I should have no sympathy for this awful piece of human trash has nothing to do with whether or not he cares about five bucks.

He had every choice not to rack up millions of dollars in debt. He had the choice not to beg to be forgiven. He had the choice to go to debt jail, which he had to know was coming after the first ten thousand dollars or so. And yet whenever he lost gambling - this is my head canon but I can't think it was any other way - he went shaking and jittery and begged his master, oh, I'm in the hole now, but I'll make it back, c'mon, I just need a few hundred more! I'm due for a lucky streak, I swear!

I also think to have loaned a slave that much money, there had to have been something wrong with the master. Enabler much? This is what I picture, anyway. If he was my slave I'd sell him for a penny. If he was waged I'd fire him. I certainly wouldn't loan him millions of dollars.

To me, there's a clear difference between the unforgiving servant, and someone who just wants to live in a world where they don't have to constantly be terrified of having everything stolen from them and wants to achieve that by having thieves pay up. Jesus would have me believe there's no difference because I farted once or whatever other sins I committed that he says racked up millions of dollars in debt to God.

The real difference is that I don't want to be forgiven. I want the punishment. This is how you know whether people are repentant. As far as I know this is the only way to know. Unfailingly, the habitual reoffender won't make something up to you. He wants off the hook for free. This is how you know he's a scum-bucket liar and manipulator. Apologies are cheap, because he and those like him cheapened them. But if I'm really sorry? I'm willing to make it up until whatever minuscule benefit I got is erased and then some. Now the cold, hard, logical truth is that I ought not have done whatever it was, and since I made it that way, it should be easy to see that I always saw it that way. This is the only way for flawed beings to show that they're sorry in a world of scamming scum-buckets getting away with everything because they claim to be flawed.
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmDid you know that there are scriptures that a person must follow in order to receive forgiveness? A person must acknowledge their sin, recognize that it is an offense against God, confess it unqualifiedly, have a deep heartfelt sorrow for the wrong done, and have a determination to turn from such a course or practice. (Ps 32:5; 51:4; 1Jo 1:8, 9; 2Co 7:8-11) They must do what they can to right the wrong or damage done or as the Bible says 'make peace' with the person they have done wrong. (Mt 5:23, 24) Then they must pray to God, asking for forgiveness on the basis of Christ’s ransom sacrifice.​—Eph 1:7. Note all of these must be met and not just the last one.
All that is about getting forgiveness from God, not other people. Other people are commanded by God to be better than God and just forgive all debts with no strings attached. There's some evidence that criminals should still be punished, but ultimately the penance for every crime is expressible as a debt, be it years in prison, years of labour, or a fine.
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmYou might want to 'let go' of the rage you might have against your mother. Not for her sake, but for your mental health. Carrying this like stuff around doesn't hurt the unrepentant person at all. But it will weigh you down. Don't let that happen.
Even if I could somehow just not have the trauma of being constantly stolen from, I might not choose that. I wouldn't want to be the person that thinks nothing is a big deal. I wouldn't want to be the it's-over-now-just-let-it-go guy (not that you're doing that - you aren't) who is callous to the suffering of others because he just lets everything go and never suffers himself. I'm actually glad I know what suffering and abuse and hatred means. I have a wife far more beautiful than I deserve because she has trauma too, and she was always dumping other guys because her family would do these little nasty, subtly-abusive things to her, things no one else would recognise as abusive, but I saw what they were doing and I called them on it right away. All her other boyfriends just saw it as little stuff. Oh, just let that go. Oh, there's no way your mum meant it that way; you're just imagining that. Her family immediately got terrified of me because I saw through every one of their games and tried to have me Baker Acted (there's this weird law in some states that if three people say you're crazy, you can be committed to an insane asylum basically without procedures).
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmNow briefly, if what happened to you happened in a JW congregation and your mother was a baptized unrepentant drunkard and thief, then she would be what we call, disfellowshipped. Not even speak a greeting to her. Many don't agree with disfellowshipping but it is Biblical and it is a last resort.
Well, plus to JWs then. (Actually it would depend on whether the higher-ups were taken in by her BS, or my family's BS. I feel like my grandmother might have overfilled the old collection plate at the Unitarian church to make that meeting happen.)

As an aside, I do, however, still think it may be unfair to not give your child Christmas presents when every other child gets the like. You guys happen to be right that it's 90% a Pagan holiday and if Jesus was real there was no way he was actually born in winter. The disconnect is where modern Christmas can't be blasphemous because it never claimed to be holy. It's not holy to me; I'm an atheist and I give presents on Christmas. I feel like modern Christmas is just a Western tradition, and not a religious one anymore. I don't see why you can't just celebrate it but call it something else, like Happy Present Day, and Happy Present Day Eve. So Pagans invented those rituals. So what? You can't decorate a tree because when Pagans do it, they're celebrating Pagan gods? What if Pagans brushed their teeth to pay homage to Fango, The Pearly-White Wolf of Winter? I argue that you can still brush your teeth and just leave Fango out of it, even if Pagans invented the toothbrush and even if it was for that reason.

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Re: Former Atheists - What convinced you?

Post #222

Post by 2timothy316 »

Purple Knight wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 11:42 pm
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmOk first of all I'm a cat lover so this upsets me. So I I can empathize with you. If someone took one of my cats to sell them, I'd probably come unglued.
I did come unglued, I just had to stuff it since nobody was on my side.
I don't think I would have stuffed it personally. If they truly were showing that they were trying to tell me, 'well that is just the way she is' and then make me out to be the bad guy, I'd have to burn some bridges. Which is saying a lot as I have only done like 3 times in my whole life. All of which are still acting the same way today as the last time I broke all ties with them. One a former boss that I had to quit my job because they were racist, one friend who abused his family with abusing drugs, and one is a family member who is both racist and abusing drugs. I'd forgive them if they ever turned from their ways. But they all love being what they are, so it's a nope from me, I want nothing to do with them.
I loved that cat in addition to her being a monumentally valuable possession. She slept on my face every night. I loved her babies too, but parting with them was something I had to do because I needed the income at the time. I was just at the point where if she had her usual number, I could have kept one, and then that. I had to move away. It was the only way to get away from those alcoholic scum. Besides me, everyone in my immediate family is either alcoholic themself, or an enabler.
I'm reminded of Ecc chapter 3 where it says there is a time for everything. Verse six says there is a time to seek and a time to give up as lost. Sounds like you made a wise decision to me.
I had to build up my whole life again, from scratch, and I'm just now at the point where I have a house and show cats again. I compulsively do head counts and freak out when something sounds like the door opening. They're not day- and nightmares about just having my cats stolen, but about having that happen, and the thief being good and myself evil.
I know what you mean. You should hear the things I'm called for refusing to get near or even talk to my family member. I'm totally the bad guy for refusing to associate with a person that if I typed some of the stuff they have said, I'd be banned from this site in less than a minute. I'm one of those people that yes I love family and friends. Yes I would do a lot for them. But I'm also one of those people you see on the news where a person turns in one of their own family for a serious crime. I will not protect a person from justice. If they are willing to do a 180 in their lifestyle I'd help with getting through the prison time. If not, then they can do it on their own.
This is what alcoholism does, and then alcoholics go to what I honestly believe is a cult to be taught a smashup form of Christianity/Judaism/Islam that claims it's "spiritual, but not a religion" and forces everyone else to forgive whatever horrible things they do because they're alcoholics. There's an episode of South Park that sums it up perfectly.

This is... not an exaggeration. Alcoholics Anonymous literally teaches this to alcoholics: You are sick. You can't help it. Only God can help you help it. This is an example of why I don't believe in the First Amendment. I don't think baby-eaters, animal sacrificers, or seriously dangerous cults need legal protection because "itz a religion lol haha free immunity blanket i break laws now".
Now that you mention it, AA is like another religion. The friend that I no longer speak to now did try to do a 180 in his life 3 years ago. He finally got 14 months in prison for having a illegal substance and the judge was sick of letting him off the hook. He started AA before he went thinking that would clean him of his errors. They pump Jesus forgives in to their heads etc etc. You know what I'm talking about. Just before he went into prison which BTW he was freaking out. He mother gave me his number. His mother is a JW as well. She wanted me to try to talk to him again. I thought, well I'll give him a chance. He told me that he wanted to know the Bible as well as I do. I said I'd help him with that. He only ended up having to do like 6 months in prison. I helped him the whole time. Put money on his books so that he could get snacks. Did in person visits. In fact I was the only one that went to see him. All his other 'buddies' had records and couldn't be allowed near a prison. He said that he loved God. I said ok, do you know what that means? He said, just love'em. I brought out 2 John verse 6. "And this is what love means, that we go on walking according to his commandments." I then I read to him 2 Cor 7:1, "let us cleanse ourselves of every defilement of flesh." I told him this would include abusing drugs and alcohol. He told me ok. Then he got out of prison. Long story short, 3 years later he is back doing exactly what he was doing before. 2 Pet. 2:22 calls this a person that returned to their own vomit or a pig that was bathed but returned to rolling in filth. Why did he do that? Because he said he like the AA way. Just do whatever chant they had him do to make him feel better. That is what he wanted. Here is the kicker though. He told me he knew what I and his mother was teaching was the right way. When he confessed that to me and then told me that he liked the AA way better. I was done. I feel like I was played and manipulated. But I raise my head high that I tried to show him real practical way out of his problems and how the Bible tells how to show our love to God. The principle is this: Do you think your life a gift? Then stop trashing it!! All the other problems associated with trashing you life will resolve themselves. I didn't expect it overnight. I expected years. I also expected progress and got nadda. He is now back with all those people that couldn't see him in prison. He abandoned me, his mother, and as far as I tell by his actions, Jehovah too. He sent me a text about 2 months ago asking for money. I didn't even respond.
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmCan you see how knowing the currency conversion makes this parable easier to understand what Jesus was trying to teach?
I see how the slave was a greedy piece of offal. In order to rack up millions of dollars in debt while being a slave (some translations I'm told have this as slave, not servant), in which state your needs are provided for, as far as I see it, you pretty much have to be a gambling addict who might as well be glued to a slot machine. Why was he so concerned about five bucks? Well, to me it's obvious he wanted it to gamble with. Why I feel I should have no sympathy for this awful piece of human trash has nothing to do with whether or not he cares about five bucks.

He had every choice not to rack up millions of dollars in debt. He had the choice not to beg to be forgiven. He had the choice to go to debt jail, which he had to know was coming after the first ten thousand dollars or so. And yet whenever he lost gambling - this is my head canon but I can't think it was any other way - he went shaking and jittery and begged his master, oh, I'm in the hole now, but I'll make it back, c'mon, I just need a few hundred more! I'm due for a lucky streak, I swear!

I also think to have loaned a slave that much money, there had to have been something wrong with the master. Enabler much? This is what I picture, anyway. If he was my slave I'd sell him for a penny. If he was waged I'd fire him. I certainly wouldn't loan him millions of dollars.

To me, there's a clear difference between the unforgiving servant, and someone who just wants to live in a world where they don't have to constantly be terrified of having everything stolen from them and wants to achieve that by having thieves pay up. Jesus would have me believe there's no difference because I farted once or whatever other sins I committed that he says racked up millions of dollars in debt to God.

The real difference is that I don't want to be forgiven. I want the punishment. This is how you know whether people are repentant. As far as I know this is the only way to know. Unfailingly, the habitual reoffender won't make something up to you. He wants off the hook for free. This is how you know he's a scum-bucket liar and manipulator. Apologies are cheap, because he and those like him cheapened them. But if I'm really sorry? I'm willing to make it up until whatever minuscule benefit I got is erased and then some. Now the cold, hard, logical truth is that I ought not have done whatever it was, and since I made it that way, it should be easy to see that I always saw it that way. This is the only way for flawed beings to show that they're sorry in a world of scamming scum-buckets getting away with everything because they claim to be flawed.
That is why the parable should not have directed at you. You were not being petty and you were not demanding from someone that owes you a petty debt. The Jews of the time would condemn a man for the slightest infraction. Like not keeping with a non-Biblical practice of washing their hands up to their elbow. (Matthew 15:2) That's petty. No, someone stole something from you and had no remorse to correct the wrong. That is not the principle of the parable. There is only one comfort I know of and that is people reap what they sow. If they sow misery they will reap misery. You not will have to do nothing for justice to come crashing down on them. No light escapes from a black hole. Miserable people are black holes and should be avoided like black holes. Otherwise they suck you in with their self destruction.
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmDid you know that there are scriptures that a person must follow in order to receive forgiveness? A person must acknowledge their sin, recognize that it is an offense against God, confess it unqualifiedly, have a deep heartfelt sorrow for the wrong done, and have a determination to turn from such a course or practice. (Ps 32:5; 51:4; 1Jo 1:8, 9; 2Co 7:8-11) They must do what they can to right the wrong or damage done or as the Bible says 'make peace' with the person they have done wrong. (Mt 5:23, 24) Then they must pray to God, asking for forgiveness on the basis of Christ’s ransom sacrifice.​—Eph 1:7. Note all of these must be met and not just the last one.
All that is about getting forgiveness from God, not other people. Other people are commanded by God to be better than God and just forgive all debts with no strings attached. There's some evidence that criminals should still be punished, but ultimately the penance for every crime is expressible as a debt, be it years in prison, years of labour, or a fine.
Who can be better than God? I only allow those close to me who understand that my standards of forgiveness are God's standards of forgiveness. The way I see it, Jehovah is not going to expect me to do something that he wouldn't Himself. The only forgiveness that would be beneficial is fore go the hate or the resentment. That is not command though and there is no command that you must put yourself back in harm's way either. Like you, if I have this wrong, then punish me with eternal death because I do not want to live an eternity with unrepentant evildoers who I have give a pass. That's just asinine to have a world like that.
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmYou might want to 'let go' of the rage you might have against your mother. Not for her sake, but for your mental health. Carrying this like stuff around doesn't hurt the unrepentant person at all. But it will weigh you down. Don't let that happen.
Even if I could somehow just not have the trauma of being constantly stolen from, I might not choose that. I wouldn't want to be the person that thinks nothing is a big deal. I wouldn't want to be the it's-over-now-just-let-it-go guy (not that you're doing that - you aren't) who is callous to the suffering of others because he just lets everything go and never suffers himself. I'm actually glad I know what suffering and abuse and hatred means. I have a wife far more beautiful than I deserve because she has trauma too, and she was always dumping other guys because her family would do these little nasty, subtly-abusive things to her, things no one else would recognise as abusive, but I saw what they were doing and I called them on it right away. All her other boyfriends just saw it as little stuff. Oh, just let that go. Oh, there's no way your mum meant it that way; you're just imagining that. Her family immediately got terrified of me because I saw through every one of their games and tried to have me Baker Acted (there's this weird law in some states that if three people say you're crazy, you can be committed to an insane asylum basically without procedures).
Trauma, getting angry and grief is not the same as holding on the anger. Imagine it like pulling on a rope tied to something that will never move. No matter how angry and frustrated you get you're not going to budge that object. Same with those unrepentant ones. Holding on to anger and frustration is not going to change them. But it will change you. I'd never say to allow abusive things go either. The Bible points out, "Like a madman who shoots fiery missiles, arrows, and death [harmful things] Is the man who plays a trick on his neighbor and says, “I was only joking!” (Proverbs 26:18, 19) People that you're describing that do nasty harmful things and call it a joke, the Bible calls crazy.

I had to callout my own wife on abusive speech. I don't mind a little ribbing. But I don't like something personal being used for a punchline. I allowed her to do it once and I said nothing. She did it again, this time it really hurt my feelings bad. I had to resist the temptation to meet harm for harm. Instead I let myself cool off, I let my go of my emotions not in anger, but in raw tears of pain. To this day she has never made fun of me in that way again.
2timothy316 wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 3:43 pmNow briefly, if what happened to you happened in a JW congregation and your mother was a baptized unrepentant drunkard and thief, then she would be what we call, disfellowshipped. Not even speak a greeting to her. Many don't agree with disfellowshipping but it is Biblical and it is a last resort.
Well, plus to JWs then. (Actually it would depend on whether the higher-ups were taken in by her BS, or my family's BS. I feel like my grandmother might have overfilled the old collection plate at the Unitarian church to make that meeting happen.)

As an aside, I do, however, still think it may be unfair to not give your child Christmas presents when every other child gets the like. You guys happen to be right that it's 90% a Pagan holiday and if Jesus was real there was no way he was actually born in winter. The disconnect is where modern Christmas can't be blasphemous because it never claimed to be holy. It's not holy to me; I'm an atheist and I give presents on Christmas. I feel like modern Christmas is just a Western tradition, and not a religious one anymore. I don't see why you can't just celebrate it but call it something else, like Happy Present Day, and Happy Present Day Eve. So Pagans invented those rituals. So what? You can't decorate a tree because when Pagans do it, they're celebrating Pagan gods? What if Pagans brushed their teeth to pay homage to Fango, The Pearly-White Wolf of Winter? I argue that you can still brush your teeth and just leave Fango out of it, even if Pagans invented the toothbrush and even if it was for that reason.
It comes down to the question of worship in Christmas. If anything I hope you get from my replies is that my JW folks and myself try as best we can to live by a righteous standard. Besides a clean conscience, we have seen that to try to live by that standard it protects us from many dangers and things that would harm us. In the example of Christmas, since we don't celebrate it: We are not in debt, there is no guilt because we are too poor to afford a gift, we are not encouraging our children it's ok to lie for fun but encourage them to seek truth, our children are rewarded for good behavior all year round, give when you want to not when told to, and last year was particularly important not to celebrate as we didn't gather in huge family groups to spread Covid to each other. I give gifts to people and even kids all the time. They are always grateful. When I used to celebrate Christmas, I rarely felt good about it and the gift was rarely genuinely appreciated.

As far as the toothbrush thing, there are many scriptures that point to keeping one's self clean and healthy. There is no law against that. Would I brush my teeth in front of a statue of a god? Of course not! Does this mean I can't brush my teeth ever? Consider this: People eat dinner on Christmas, do you think I skip dinner because that? No, I need to eat to live. Brushing my teeth can prevents tooth decay and even heart disease. There is no ritual that can have a monopoly on all sustenance or health.

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Re: Former Atheists - What convinced you?

Post #223

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rikuoamero wrote: Mon Aug 31, 2015 7:35 am What I'm writing here is for those people who consider themselves to be former atheist i.e. at one point in life, they either lacked a belief in a god of any kind, or actively disbelieved there is a God (there's a difference between the two).
I'm hoping that at least some people who are of this group (and hopefully joined the usergroup called 'Former Atheist' on this site) are/were also skeptical, in that they demanded evidence for religious claims.

My question is - What is it that convinced you? If you were to somehow go back in time and meet your previous, atheist (hopefully skeptic) self, would you or could you use whatever it is that convinced you to convince that version of you? Or would your past self be skeptical and dismissive of what it is you present?

Just to be clear - This isn't restricted to Christians only. You can be a Muslim who considers him/herself former atheist or whatever religion or belief you subscribe to. I want to hear from you.
I also promise NOT to debate in this thread. All I want are responses and your thoughts on this question. I will probably debate elsewhere, but not on this thread. This thread is solely for me to gather information.
From a very early age I was amazed at the natural world and my mother bought me a great set of encyclopedias (20 volumes I think, Arthur Mee) when I was about 9 I guess. I spent hours going through these books, often drawn more to the science sections than the others areas.

At this same time the Apollo moonshot was underway and this project dominated UK science television, it was huge, always some show or report going on that was about this. Also at that time and later we had in the UK numerous other shows that touched on science, Tomorrow's World, Horizon, The Ascent of Man, Sagan's Cosmos and more.

I was an avid reader too of Superman and Flash comics which were to all intents and purposes science fiction. So this was my "world" it was the world, everything could be connected to everything else, everything happened because of something, the reason for this was that and so on, this way of thinking became deeply ingrained in my mind. Later I became immersed in mathematics and theoretical physics having read about "moving clocks g slow" in an old edition of the Guinness Book of Records (of all places) when I was 14.

I read a little about Einstein and relativity and later became more and more immersed in this.

My hobbies in my mid/late teens included electronics, astronomy, bird watching, collecting birds eggs, collecting old science books and so on, I told my mother I'd never have a Bible in my house once, saying it was useless (she was not really religious but sometimes read the Bible). So this was me, this was my world, I knew quite a lot for a kid - many kids into science do - my interests spanned Einstein, Newton, Darwin, Faraday and many many of the famous scientists from the past.

Then something happened.

I had a friend who - to my amazement - actually attended a church regularly, I'd known him for years and this had simply never come up before, so I laughed at him!

Anyway over time we'd talk about stuff and naturally I was amused that he'd fallen for a load of religious claptrap, but he did challenge me about evolution to see if I could really prove that what is claimed is in fact true, not to him but to myself. I dismissed this as a waste of time however. Later though I did begin to ponder, how - as someone well versed in logic, mathematics and so on - would such a proof look like if I were to try and put one together, that was the start of a learning period for me. Over time I found that the many arguments I'd read in books and seen on TV and so on, just didn't really stand up, required a lot of trust and extrapolation which in my mind opened the possibility that it could actually be wrong.

Bear in mind I was trying to support evolution but I began to be aware that I must value truth above prejudice, if evolution was the reason life around us is at is then frankly this should not bee hard to prove but it really was tough, there were so many unanswered questions, playing devil's advocate with myself was revealing things to me.

Eventually I reached a point where I was prepared to say evolution is not true, is not the mechanism that gave rise to the life we see around us, my decision was reached after several years of struggle to be truly open minded, the temptation was never far away to just say "F**k this man, we know this must have happened naturally, sure if one wants to believe the God explanation one can but forced to choose I'm with Darwin". But I did not, I needed to be truly honest with myself and just because I found my old, familiar world comfortable, that isn't how one finds truth.
When one has eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

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