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Nilloc James
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science jokes

Post #1

Post by Nilloc James »

Jokes about science/scientists:

What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium.

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LiamOS
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Post #2

Post by LiamOS »

I used to wonder what the difference between sin(k) and cos(k) was, but it was only a phase.

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Post #3

Post by Goat »

Two men walked into a bar. The first man said "I'll have some H20' . The second man said "I'll have some H2O too'. The second man died.
“What do you think science is? There is nothing magical about science. It is simply a systematic way for carefully and thoroughly observing nature and using consistent logic to evaluate results. So which part of that exactly do you disagree with? Do you disagree with being thorough? Using careful observation? Being systematic? Or using consistent logic?�

Steven Novella

olavisjo
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Re: science jokes

Post #4

Post by olavisjo »

Heisenberg went for a drive and got stopped by a traffic cop. The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replied, "No, but I know where I am."
"I believe in no religion. There is absolutely no proof for any of them, and from a philosophical standpoint Christianity is not even the best. All religions, that is, all mythologies to give them their proper name, are merely man’s own invention..."

C.S. Lewis

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McCulloch
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Post #5

Post by McCulloch »

In physics:

Power = Work ÷ Time

However, Knowledge is Power and Time is Money.

Therefore:

Knowledge = Work ÷ Money

Solve for Money:

Money = Work ÷ Knowledge

Therefore, the less you know, the more you will make. Sales staff and Executives earn more than Engineers.
Examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good.
First Epistle to the Church of the Thessalonians
The truth will make you free.
Gospel of John

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Post #6

Post by McCulloch »

Einstein, Newton, and Pascal were hanging out one afternoon.

Einstein is bored so he suggests "Let's play hide and seek, I'll be it!"

The others agree, so Einstein begins counting "1... 2... 3... "

Pascal runs off right away to find a place to hide.

But Newton merely takes out a piece of chalk and draws a mid-sized square.

He finishes and steps into the square just before Einstein shouts "Ready or not, here I come!"

Einstein looks up and immediately spots Newton standing right in front of him.

He says "I found you, Newton!"

Newton replies "No, you found one Newton per square meter -- you found Pascal!"
Examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good.
First Epistle to the Church of the Thessalonians
The truth will make you free.
Gospel of John

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