The Role of Forgiveness in Apologetics

[Paul of Tarsus]

This question is mainly for Christian apologists, but all are welcome to answer it, of course. Should apologists be more forgiving of those skeptics who have mistreated them in some way? I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving. I'm wondering how other apologists feel about this issue.

[bjs1]

[Replying to Paul of Tarsus in post #1]

Yes, forgive. Always.

Study the parable of the Unmercifully Servant in Matthew 18. Consider your own sins and compare them to any mistreatment you have received. If you are like me you will find that the debt you owe is far greater than any debt owed to you.

In Micah the prophet summed up what is good and what the Lord desires of His people. Micah said it was to, “Act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God.” Mercy was place on par with good works and a faithful relationship with God as one of our highest priorities.

If you struggle to forgive I recommend dedicating time (about 15 minutes) every day to meditating on the Matthew 18 over the next month. Also set aside time to fast and pray that God will grant you a merciful heart.

[Tcg]

I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving.

In what way have you been mistreated by atheists? Are you describing something that happened during your practice of apologetics?


Tcg

[Miles]

This question is mainly for Christian apologists, but all are welcome to answer it, of course. Should apologists be more forgiving of those skeptics who have mistreated them in some way?

More forgiving than whom?

I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving. I'm wondering how other apologists feel about this issue.

Curious: mistreated in what way? I ask because I'm an atheist.


.

[Difflugia]

This question is mainly for Christian apologists, but all are welcome to answer it, of course. Should apologists be more forgiving of those skeptics who have mistreated them in some way? I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving. I'm wondering how other apologists feel about this issue.

Details are important, of course, but bear in mind that there's a difference between forgiveness and either placing yourself or allowing others to be in a position where they can hurt you again.

In the context of an online forum, this one is actually a pretty good example of what I'd call a Christian balance. There's a bit of occasional sniping from both sides and the mods are pretty tolerant, but when someone shows themselves to be truly abusive and persistently recalcitrant, they get banned. If, after you've looked around, you should pretty quickly get a feel for what kind of behavior is tolerated and what isn't. If you still find the tolerated behavior to be too harsh or the leash afforded (at least temporarily) to persistent trolls to be too long, then I might humbly suggest that you'd be better off at an all-Christian forum. If, however, you can put up with your views being challenged, while knowing that any genuine abuse will be short-lived, then welcome aboard. For what it's worth, I haven't noticed abuse being unfairly tolerated from either Christian or atheists and bannings seem to be about evenly split. Long-term trolls are banned and aren't allowed back, but on the other hand, there's no taunting ("you're going to be banned!") or gloating ("glad she's gone!"). In the context of an anonymous internet forum, that seems to be a pretty good model to emulate.

Is that more forgiving than a typical non-Christian? Perhaps. On the other hand, I suspect that it's also more forgiving than most Christians, so it's probably more like "walking the walk" than what I'd usually call apologetics.

[Mithrae]

Consider your own sins and compare them to any mistreatment you have received. If you are like me you will find that the debt you owe is far greater than any debt owed to you.

Probably accurate advice for all of us whether Christian or not

[nobspeople]

This question is mainly for Christian apologists, but all are welcome to answer it, of course. Should apologists be more forgiving of those skeptics who have mistreated them in some way? I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving. I'm wondering how other apologists feel about this issue.

I've noticed these days what many consider 'mistreatment of others' is due to the lack of thick skin and little to no self esteem especially when you add the need for many to use social media.
People are allowed to disagree with us.
People are allowed not to like us - rather or not they have a reason.
That's life.
In regards to forgiveness: Christians believe it's necessary to grant forgiveness in order to get it themselves, which seems rather selfish to be honest. Many other people say forgiveness is needed for one to 'get on with their lives'. Easier said than done with some for sure.
Personally, while I see how forgiveness could be beneficial for an individual, but I don't think it's necessary. If you don't want to forgive someone else, and live with the ramifications that comes with it, go with it.

[Paul of Tarsus]

[Replying to Paul of Tarsus in post #1]

Yes, forgive. Always.

Study the parable of the Unmercifully Servant in Matthew 18. Consider your own sins and compare them to any mistreatment you have received. If you are like me you will find that the debt you owe is far greater than any debt owed to you.

In Micah the prophet summed up what is good and what the Lord desires of His people. Micah said it was to, “Act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God.” Mercy was place on par with good works and a faithful relationship with God as one of our highest priorities.

If you struggle to forgive I recommend dedicating time (about 15 minutes) every day to meditating on the Matthew 18 over the next month. Also set aside time to fast and pray that God will grant you a merciful heart.

Thanks a lot for the advice, but I'm still wondering what exactly it means to forgive. Obviously it doesn't mean to approve of the wrong. Does it mean to just overlook the wrong as if it never happened? If I do that, then I might make myself vulnerable to being wronged again.

It might help if I explain what happened. In an "atheist" forum I asked some questions about the Bible in the subsection that dealt with issues related to Christianity. The atheists there started mocking me. One of them called me a "sneaky bastard." I became very angry and told him off. I thought it was really stupid of them to haunt a forum about Christian issues only to laugh off talking about the Bible, and I told them so.

WWJD?

[Paul of Tarsus]

I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving.

In what way have you been mistreated by atheists? Are you describing something that happened during your practice of apologetics?

I've had atheists ridicule me when I've taken stances they disagree with on various issues like euthanasia. It's common for atheists to criticize Christians for their alleged intolerance, but I know that atheists can be every bit as intolerant and fanatical as Christians are. If you disagree with them, then look out!

Anyway, I've had those kinds of experiences long before I decided to get into apologetics. I just recently decided to defend Christianity.

[Paul of Tarsus]

This question is mainly for Christian apologists, but all are welcome to answer it, of course. Should apologists be more forgiving of those skeptics who have mistreated them in some way?

More forgiving than whom?

Apologists should be more forgiving than they've been in the past. To be honest, some apologists are not very forgiving. I've seen them make a point of putting some atheists on their permanent "dirt list" if those apologists feel they've been wronged by atheists. It seems really petty and vindictive.

I've been mistreated by atheists, and it's hard to be forgiving. I'm wondering how other apologists feel about this issue.

Curious: mistreated in what way? I ask because I'm an atheist.

Well, just recently in an atheist forum I was called a "sneaky bastard" for just asking some questions about the Bible. That kind of behavior really harms the chances of those of us who want intelligent and sensible discussions about the issues in Christianity.