Church Life

[SeaPriestess]

Hello,

I recently decided to start going back to church. There are a few ways I want to contribute. There are some things, creative things I want to do with music and maybe theater. For years I struggled with the thought of going back to church because there were just so many things I could not reconcile. I'm not trying to do that here, necessarily. However, it is my suspicion that the type of church I'll feel most comfortable in may not desire a deeper spiritual life but more like being part of a social club. On the other hand, the type of church, where people are really there as an act of meaningful spiritual ritual may tend to be too "religious", legalistic, judgmental, non-inclusive etc...I've been in those churches in the past. My conscience will not let me do that now in my life. But maybe, just maybe, I could still attend those types of churches. How will I navigate the bigotry etc....Isn't that sad though? Not hopeful that I can find authentic Christians/Jesus lovers who are into their faith and church life but who aren't mistaken in their understanding of scripture and how to apply it. Maybe I should just bag the whole idea. Idk....So, my question is, how to navigate in a church environment when you disagree with the general culture of the group and/or what is being taught? When do you know if it's time to move on? I was going to let my conscience guide me, not only my conscience of course, but if I was given the types of opportunities I was looking for, there might be my answer?

Thank you.

[Tart]

Hello,

I recently decided to start going back to church. There are a few ways I want to contribute. There are some things, creative things I want to do with music and maybe theater. For years I struggled with the thought of going back to church because there were just so many things I could not reconcile. I'm not trying to do that here, necessarily. However, it is my suspicion that the type of church I'll feel most comfortable in may not desire a deeper spiritual life but more like being part of a social club. On the other hand, the type of church, where people are really there as an act of meaningful spiritual ritual may tend to be too "religious", legalistic, judgmental, non-inclusive etc...I've been in those churches in the past. My conscience will not let me do that now in my life. But maybe, just maybe, I could still attend those types of churches. How will I navigate the bigotry etc....Isn't that sad though? Not hopeful that I can find authentic Christians/Jesus lovers who are into their faith and church life but who aren't mistaken in their understanding of scripture and how to apply it. Maybe I should just bag the whole idea. Idk....So, my question is, how to navigate in a church environment when you disagree with the general culture of the group and/or what is being taught? When do you know if it's time to move on? I was going to let my conscience guide me, not only my conscience of course, but if I was given the types of opportunities I was looking for, there might be my answer?

Thank you.

Great question SeaPriestess,

I too struggle with my church, which I actually just decided to leave and look for another. I personally think Christians are the hardest people to get along with, where the world sometimes seems much more welcoming then the Church... However, I am convinced this is design... I have lived in the world, and I have been accepted by the world, and it led me to destruction. Where everyone spoke well of me, but I was being led astray.

I recognized that with my calling to God, and to Jesus Christ. Now I look to be called out of the World (just as the scriptures say). I pray to live with God... But unlike my time in the world, my time in God is full of struggles and temptations, persecution and tribulation, and of being refined by fire.

Its God's design...

My advice would be to seek to live in, and be like Christ. Because Jesus is the truth, we should expect to find a church that reflects the same appearance of that of the 1st century when Jesus lived. And it was the Church that persecuted Jesus Christ... And they killed him, while he prayed for their forgiveness... We are no greater then our master....


I get your struggle though... I have a hard time getting along with many people in my church. They are not welcoming people, and they look at me as if im less of a person... And i get mad, and i speak out against it sometimes, and harbor resentment, and im leaving the church and finding a new one... But i truly think it is design... We shouldnt expect to be any greater then Christ was... And if i was a better man, i could endure with long suffering and forgiveness and be graceful to those who persecute.... Its just hard sometimes...

[brianbbs67]

[Replying to post 28 by brianbbs67]

I never said I wanted to find a church that agrees with me. I was clear that one probably never will. My question is how to navigate in an environment where you do not agree with certain things. In other words, how to get along with fallen, flawed, annoying Christians? One of my faults, I must admit, and certainly I have struggled applying Jesus' words in this very thing. The thing of those who claim to be Christians and have NO love. They are everywhere, all over the church buildings and church groups. Anyone can play a part, anyone can fit into a certain group or culture just by imitating the others that APPEAR to be all knowledgeable and "look at me, I'm so spiritual, I read the bible cover to cover 34 times etc..." Some people just wanted to be accepted, or recognized or belong to something. Does not mean for one second that their lives and those they touch reflect the fruits of the spirit. Yet, this unloving state of so-called Christians, spread like wild-fire, damages people's spirits. Its like poison and I have seen it do its damage more times than I can count. So, I'm understandably gun shy. The hope I had was dashed. My trust was broken. Damage was done. I'm over it. However, when I go back inside one of those places, so called "churches", I'm extremely uncomfortable. I've known many very real Christians in my life, church going ones. But they are honestly, very few and far between. I want to be with people like that. One's who embody God's love. IN the meantime, I can serve. I have gifts. I'm not looking for real Christians necessarily to confirm that I'm in the right "church". But I'm just trying to learn how to deal with the disappointment I have and probably will encounter again in my search.

Ok, sorry if my question was abrupt but I just wanted to get to the crux of the matter.

Unfortunately the majority are as you described, in almost every church. I find the smaller ones to be better at eliminating this. (100 or less in attendance ) But, that all depends on who the shepard is. A good shepard, once he knows of this behavior, would end it. Either way, you will face this in life regardless.

People do one of two things. The edify you or they drag you down. Let the ones who drag you down go. Seek the edifying. Look for those better(as you think) than your self and seek company. And once you have gotten there, seek even better ones. It is a journey. And you will be tested, a lot, until you respond correctly, over and over. Take it like a sports team practice or basic training in the military. It is finite and you will come out better in the end.

Hold to what is right and good, regardless. It will work out. Most importantly, pray. Pray all the time for guidance and help. Pray when you wake . Pray when driving(with open eyes);). Just pray as often as you can. Good will come even if it takes a while. All blessings flow from God. That's right if something good happens in your life, God has directed it , directly or indirectly. Once you have trained yourself to be good as a lifestyle, it begats only more good and more blessing. Its not easy at first. Actually , its hard some times even later. Its our perseverance in the face of extreme hardship that leads us to reward.

Never lose faith or blame God for what has happened. Usually, it our choice or others that causes distress. Not His ever. Unless, you are Job... But he was greatly rewarded later and lived to 140 in good health for his 20 years he suffered.

[SeaPriestess]

[Replying to post 30 by Overcomer]

I adore C.S. Lewis. It's been many moon's since I read Mere Christianity though. I will have to pick it up again. Never a bad thing to read C.S. Lewis. Thanks!

[SeaPriestess]

[Replying to post 31 by Tart]

Thank you. I really appreciate your answer. I've actually never been able to just let all this out with any Christians without getting the same condescending rote verse references and elitist condescending attitudes. It helps to know others who have felt the same way and what they did. It's rare to find Christians who will be dang honest! Thank you!

[SeaPriestess]

[Replying to post 32 by brianbbs67]

Thank you. Yes, I can acknowledge many times where I fell short and caused my own suffering. Excellent point about the Shepard and smaller churches. I have experienced this. I will hold on to that, also.