Daily laugh

FinalEnigma · Post by **FinalEnigma** » Thu Feb 19, 2009 4:00 pm

Everybody likes to laugh, so I thought I'd amuse myself by starting a thread with the purpose of just posting whatever funny things you come across to brighten others' days just a little bit. So feel free to post away. it can be jokes, pictures, funny stories, anything that makes you laugh.

The Tongue · Post by **The Tongue** » Sat Apr 06, 2013 10:49 pm

This bloke was sitting on the court-house steps crying his eyes out, and I says to him, What's the matter mate, "Did your lawyer give you some bad advise?"

Nah! He replies, he didn't give me any bad advise, 'He bloody sold it to me."

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Sun Apr 07, 2013 10:16 pm

How do you make a lawyer scream?

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Sun Apr 07, 2013 10:16 pm

Set him on fire.

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Sun Apr 07, 2013 10:20 pm

[Replying to post 306 by Danmark]

Ha ha yes that is better!

I heard that joke when I was a kid.

The Tongue · Post by **The Tongue** » Mon Apr 08, 2013 5:41 pm

I heard this one about an American politician who was visiting Australia, you can put any name to him that you choose.

This American politician was at a function where he mingled with many Australian dignitaries. Having met one of our top psychiatrists, he asked how he could determine if the patient was mentally stable of not? To which the psychiatrist answered; "In most cases I simple ask them a question and make my assessment on their answer."

Asked by the politician to be given an example, the psychiatrist said, "Well let's say that I was to tell you that Captain Cook made three exploration voyages and died on one of those adventures, and was to ask you, 'on which voyage' did he die?' What would be your Answer?"

To which the American politician replied, "By Jingo, you've got me there, I never was much on history."

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Mon Apr 08, 2013 9:05 pm

How do you make a plumber cry?

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Mon Apr 08, 2013 9:08 pm

Break his leg.

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Mon Apr 15, 2013 1:28 am

There is no theory of evolution just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

AdHoc · Post by **AdHoc** » Fri Apr 19, 2013 10:04 am

My nephew told me a pretty funny story about an exchange he had with his teacher about a video project he created.

Teacher: This project is great! Do you mind if I share it with classes in the future?

Nephew: Ya sure, as long you take me with you when go there in your time machine.

assisigirl · Post by **assisigirl** » Sat Apr 20, 2013 2:54 pm

How do you know Jesus was from the country? (rural)

1.He left home when he was 30.

2.He hung around with his 12 mates.

3. He believed his mother was a virgin.